Hope

It's another day and I'm here at one of my favorite spots, sipping on my java and warming my insides and heart. It's chilly outside, with a sprinkle of rain teasing the earth. There's two construction-esque fellows sitting across from me, and the one fellow is telling the other about that guy in California who was apparently in his prius when it sped up to 94mph and he had to call 911. The guy hearing the story for the first time thinks it's hilarious and is forcing out a wheezy laugh while rearing his head back and shutting his eyes. One of those hearty kinds of laughs. It made me laugh. I guess he was laughing at the fact that he called 911, but it's hard to say.

Anyway hope is on my mind. I've been wondering where to find some? It has been somewhat elusive lately, or I should I say I fear that I've been duped. Duped into anchoring myself in a mere wish instead of true hope. I have been catching on to the lies. Disappointment has left me doubting hope. Doubting that it really carries, empowers, or even gives life.I kinda feel like hope didn't come through for me. But as I take time to look at my heart, I can see the fault lines which I crossed unknowingly. A wish that I had mistaken for hope. Wishing for things in life to look a certain way, for God to do this or that. Maybe that even falls under the definition of hope, I don't know. All I know is that this type of hope is not alive. It's not living. I am after the type of hope that is alive and well, empowering me to face the day. Hope that does not disappoint.  Because that is what is promised to me.  I have realized, as I've wrestled through the disappointment of the seasons, that my hope was placed in shakeable things.  In things that are movable and not steadfast.  And at the end of the day, disappointment has reared its head and made its home in my heart.  An unwelcomed guest you could say.  But what do you do when you place hope in something, thinking that its true and noble, only to find that it crumbles like a castle in sand?  Wasted time and energy, poured into it, only to come up empty handed.  But maybe not completely empty handed.  Live and learn right?  Wisdom has built her house.  She calls out to all those who pass by, "Let all who are simple come in here!"  I guess I should heed her call and stop in for a visit.  The problem is that folly calls out the same thing. Whose house have I been in?  When I look at the disappointment in my heart, I fear that I have heard the call of folly and tasted some of her stolen water.  But she told me it was sweet?

Oh matty, enough of the excuses.  Put your hope in things above, and not the things of this world that are fading away...